Today’s Blogtember prompt: Pass on some useful advice or information. I am pretty good at this. I excel at offering unsolicited advice, or at least thinking about it and then making a herculean effort not to butt in.
Fifty Things To Keep In Mind
Helpful Tips for Life, Art, And Blogging
1. Do it now. (Thank you, Gretchen Rubin.)
2. Originality lies not in concept but in execution. No two people will do the same thing the same way.
3. You are not the only one, there are plenty of people who share your “unpopular” opinion, and being a snowflake is pretty lonely anyway.
4. You’re allowed to cut toxic people out of your life. You’re allowed to cut toxic people out of your life. You’re allowed to cut toxic people out of your life.
5. There is no situation in which consent isn’t important.
6. Your parents aren’t always right. Your teachers aren’t always right. Your bosses aren’t always right. You’re not always right. Critical thinking is as important as self-awareness and the ability to admit when you mess up.
7. Respect is earned, not owed, and you can’t bully it or intimidate it out of people. Not even if they’re related to you. Not even if they’re your children.
8. If someone misunderstands what you meant, it’s probably because it’s not what you actually said. No one owes you trying to read your mind, and insisting on explaining what you meant is a defensive way of blaming them for not doing precisely that. Instead, reread what you said and how you said it, and apologize if necessary.
9. It’s never the victim’s fault. Ever. No ‘buts.’
10. If you feel the need to start a sentence with “I’m not ___ist, but,” you are ___ist. Shut up and think about why until you no longer believe what you were about to say is true.
11. This is an apology: “I’m sorry I did this. I’ll try to do better in the future.” This is not an apology: “I’m sorry you felt offended, but I didn’t mean it that way.” See also: If someone misunderstands what you meant, it’s probably because it’s not what you actually said. See also: It’s never the victim’s fault. No buts.
12. There is no right way to be a woman. There is no right way to be a specific sexual orientation, or race, or gender, or religion, or body type.
13. Race is not a prop, and it is not a costume, and it is not okay to erase. Claiming to be “colorblind” is a way of flaunting white privilege and not discussing social, political, institutionalized and internalized racism. There is nothing good about that.
14. There is nothing superior about modesty. Own your achievements. You are allowed to be proud of them and proud of yourself. Pride is not arrogance, and pride from women is only unattractive to misogynistic assholes. You don’t want those people liking you anyway.
15. There is no such thing as a slut.
16. Vagina is not a dirty word.
17. Only you are allowed to decide what you do to and with your own body.
18. Listen to your body. It knows what it needs better than society does.
19. There are multiple paths to go where you want to be.
20. Being cynical and being smart are not the same thing. They don’t even overlap.
21. Some people are genuinely happy being single, engaged, married, divorced, polyamorous, monogamous, asexual, aromantic, sexually active, sexually inactive, experienced, inexperienced, fat, skinny, average build, childless, pregnant, a stay-at-home parent, having a nanny, career-focused, money-focused, doing something they love that pays just enough, doing something they don’t love that pays a lot, not wearing makeup, always dressing up, taking medication for mental illness, not taking medication for mental illness, going to therapy, not going to therapy, spending lots of time alone, spending lots of time with friends, being financially independent, being financially dependent, being close to their parents, never speaking to their parents, blah, blah, blah, you get my drift. Just because they don’t share your priorities, that doesn’t mean they’re lying to you or themselves about theirs! You have absolutely no business telling them they’ll change their mind, or reassuring them that they’ll be something they haven’t told you they want to be. You’re probably wrong, and it’s a dick move anyway.
22. There’s nothing wrong or wasteful about hiring someone to do the tasks you can’t, aren’t good at, or simply don’t like to do.
23. You don’t have to be perfect to be good.
24. You don’t have to be perfect to do good.
25. You don’t have to be extraordinarily good to be successful.
26. Everything is better with a furry pet.
27. There is nothing wrong with shopping if you have the money for it. There is nothing wrong with spending money if you can afford to. That’s what money’s there for.
28. If you want to rein in a habit of randomly going shopping locally when you run an errand, carry only the money you’ll need and no credit cards.
29. If you have trouble not buying things online, have a look at my Etsy shop. I have gorgeous photography prints, cards and phone cases. Also, you can still preorder things from my exclusive handmade designer photo-printed fashion collection! Take a peek at the Indiegogo campaign I ran: LHP Collection. Just because it’s over, that doesn’t mean contributions won’t come in super handy. I also offer design services through Lix Hewett Design on Etsy!
30. Shame is for suckers.
31. Charity is not a dirty word.
32. It’s more admirable to ask for help than to wallow in your own pride and make others suffer for it.
33. Entertainment shouldn’t be a chore. Never feel like you have to watch or read something just because other people are reading it or because it’s supposed to be good. Not everyone has the same taste, and there is no right taste to have.
34. There is no guilt in pleasure. If you feel guilty for enjoying something, you’re not doing it right.
35. Celebrities don’t owe you anything. But the way you talk about them (or to them) can say a lot about you.
36. You can enjoy something while still acknowledging its faults. Criticizing something doesn’t mean you don’t love it. It usually means you do and you want it to be the best it can be. “If you don’t like, don’t watch” is an empty argument and rarely relevant to the person on the receiving end of those words.
37. You’re not required to engage critically with your entertainment if you don’t want to.
38. There is nothing greedy about choosing to make money off your work, time, and/or skills, whatever that work and time and skills are put to.
39. There is nothing clueless or naive about choosing not to make money off your work, time and/or skills, whatever that work and time and skills are put to.
40. Text that is hard to read is rarely worth reading.
41. If you’re posting images to your blog: credit the real source (i.e. not Tumblr, Pinterest or WeHeartIt) if they’re not yours, and make them all the same width if at all possible.
42. A freebie for your time: Photo Prep action for Photoshop CS4. Should be compatible with other versions. I use this on every photo I edit. Just make sure you only have one visible layer and it’s called “Background layer.” As a general rule, my editing process goes: resize or crop photo to 750 px width, prep action, adjust color, add curves, save for web as png. Simple and it really makes images look better.
43. Oh, yeah: if you want your photos to stay excellent quality when you upload them, save them as .png! Also, try not to resize your images too many times. If you have to, get the original file and resize from there (and use the Prep action above).
44. If you’re thinking about making a post with gifs illustrating the things you have done or that have happened to you, for the love of god, don’t. If you really, really have to, at least get gifs that are all the same width and good quality and proper speed, and don’t center the text around them.
45. If you have a Blogger account, you may have Captcha turned on. Captcha is super annoying. Here’s a guide to turn it off.
46. There’s no reason to restrict gift card giveaways to the US/Canada if the site the gift card is to ships internationally.
47. There is definitely no reason to restrict shipping on your shop or blog sale if the customer is going to be paying for postage anyway. Let them decide. They’ll probably move on to a different shop if they have to ask you the favor of calculating postage for them… or whether you’re willing to take their money at all.
48. Someone’s level of education is rarely a measure of intelligence, and never a guarantee or requirement.
49. Judging people’s taste in music is very possibly the worst kind of snobbery there is.
50. Assholes suck. Don’t be one.
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